In today’s first reading, 1 Samuel 1: 9-20, Hannah pours out
her soul to the Lord, telling the Lord of her agony in being barren and the
pain of repeatedly being insulted and disrespected by Peninnah, her husband’s
other wife, who has borne him children.
She is devastated by her inability to conceive and begs the Lord to
grant her a male child. Eli, the priest, observes her prayer, hears her sobbing
inconsolably, sees her lips moving and concludes that she is drunk. Brashly, he says to her: “How long will you
make a drunken show of yourself? Sober up from your wine.” Hannah, a courageous woman, a women of
integrity and inner strength, stands up to him, not allowing him to get away
with abusing her verbally and emotionally.
She puts right his wrong, telling him that she has “had neither wine nor
liquor; I was only pouring out my troubles to the Lord.”
Who am I in this Scripture story? Penninah, Hannah, or
Eli? Do I insult and degrade others,
speak down to them, treat them with disrespect, “step upon” them with rude
words, drive them to the depths of despair?
Am I Hannah, a person of integrity, a woman of faith, a person who takes
his/her sorrow, his/her agonizing moments to the Lord, asking for God’s help,
trusting in the Lord, knowing God personally and intimately in such a way that
I keep nothing from Him? Or am I Eli, who misjudges others, looks down upon
them, verbally and emotional abusing them without knowing or seeking the truth
from them?
May I have the courage to acknowledge when the Penninah and
the Eli in me. And, like Hannah, may I have the strength and the wisdom to
develop an intimate relationship, a friendship with God, that holds nothing
back from Him.
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