Grief Turned into Joy

In today's Gospel, John 16: 16-20, the disciples are trying to figure out what Jesus meant when he said to them:  "A little while and you will no longer see me, and again a little while later and you will see me.....Jesus knew that they wanted to ask him, so he said to them, 'Are you discussing with one another what I said,...Amen, amen, I say to  you, you will weep and mourn, while the world rejoices; you will grieve, but your grief will become joy.'" 

Jesus gives us the same message.  Our life here on earth is short--eighty years if we are strong, the psalmist says to us.  Our time here on earth is brief. And, from time to time,  it is filled with weeping and mourning, while the world around us rejoices.  We will grieve for a time but our sorrow will be turned into joy, just as Jesus' was!  Much of Jesus' life was filled with grief: the grief of the loss of His foster father, the grief of being rejected by many, by having chief priests and leaders of His people plotting to kill Him, the grief of others walking away from Him when He spoke of the Eucharist, that is, of eating His Body and drinking His blood. That was too much for many of His disciples.  He endured being accused of blasphemy when He spoke of being one with His Father. Jealous of His growing popularity and of the crowds following Him, the chief priests and leaders found a way to destroy Him, that is to have Him crucified as a criminal to the State of Israel. Yes, Jesus wept and mourned over Jerusalem while the world around Him rejoiced. His grief was turned into joy at the resurrection from the dead on Easter Sunday. Our grief will also be turned into joy when we, too, like Jesus, return to our Father in heaven!  May we have the courage to endure until the end of our lives, believing in Jesus, trusting Jesus and loving Jesus beyond all else that is!

What We Can Learn from Today's Scripture reading, 1 Sam: 1-8

In today's first reading, 1 Samuel 1: 1-8, we are given the story of Elkanah and his two wives, Penninah and Hannah.  Penninah has born her husband several children while Hannah is barren.  On annual visits to the Temple to offer sacrifice, Penninah engages in bullying behavior toward Hannah because of her barren state. She makes fun of her to the point that Hannah loses her appetite.  Her grief consumes her. Elkanah, who love both his wives dearly, is also effected. It hurts him deeply to see Hannah in such pain.

Bullying is not confined to Old Testament times. It goes on to this very day, even by those in high positions of authority.  Insecure people--persons who are into bullying others--may keep others subject to them by threats of violence, even murder.  In some instances, bullying occurs on a large scale basis, with leaders taunting others with machine guns, warheads, and nuclear capabilities.

Bullying, I believe, is done by very insecure people, persons with very low self-esteem. To lift oneself up, a bully pulls others down to his/her state.  Gossip of others is a form of bullying. Teasing can also be a form of lifting oneself up at the expense of others. 

Am I, are you, engaging in any form of bullying others, putting others down, demeaning or degrading others? If so, what am I, are you, really angry about? What do you, do I, need to do to strengthen our self-esteem?  What goals have I, have you, set for yourself today, this week, that will lead to an appreciation of self?   And how can you, can I, build others up, affirm others, find good in others and express that good?  And if you are a parent, grandparent, how can you affirm your child/grandchild--find at least one thing about that child that you can affirm today!  Seek to praise a child in whatever way you can. Catch a child doing good and praise him/her for that good! For instance, "I just saw you share your toy with your little sister/brother. That was kind of you. I am proud of you." Catch your spouse or a fellow Sister in religious life doing good and acknowledge it. Bullying will stop and you and I will be living according to the Gospel of Jesus.

Life and Its Demands

In today's first reading, 2Sam 1: 1-4, 11-12, 19, 23-27, we are told of David's losses of Saul and his son Jonathan, who are both slain in war with the Amalekites.  Saul and Jonathan were dear to David. David endured many personal hardships in his relationship with Saul, who preceded him as King of Israel and, at one time, sought to kill David, of whom he had grown jealous. Many times, Jonathan defended David to his father Saul.  Because of Jonathan's interventions on David's behalf, issues between Saul and David were resolved.  Saul and David became close friends and confidantes. Both highly respected each other.

In the Gospel, Mark 3: 20-21, we hear of how distraught Jesus' family is about Jesus. They are very concerned that Jesus is neglecting himself to the point of risking his health and his sanity.  They go in search of him, wanting to rescue Him and bring him back home under the caring eyes of His family and relatives.

All of us face times when we need to let go. Family members and friends leave us to engage in activities that we may think unsafe or too demanding. We may even think, as Jesus' relatives did, that some of our family members or friends have lost their senses.  In Jesus' case, He does not return home by His own choice.  Saul and David did not return home as the result of losing their lives in war.

Our recourse when letting go of that which is beyond our control is difficult.  At our disposal, however, is the same recourse that David and Jesus' relatives had: prayer.  David cries to the Lord:  How can the warriors have fallen--in the thick of the battle, slain upon your heights! I grieve for you, Jonathan my brother! Most dear have you been to me....How can the warriors have fallen, the weapons of war have perished." In the case of Jesus' relatives, we are not told how they responded in their grief but, knowing Mary's faith, we can conclude that she and her relatives sought God's help to grow in their understanding of Jesus' call to ministry and to the reasons He gave His all, sometimes not taking the time to eat or sleep that they considered essential for Him to maintain His strength and sanity. No doubt, however, they heard Jesus, directly or indirectly, say to His disciples: "My food is to do the will of Him who sent me" (John 4: 34).

How do you deal with grief?  What sustains you when you barely have time to eat or sleep in caring for others or carrying out your ministry to those in need?

Another Thanksgiving Reflection

Sister Joan Chittister, a Benedictine Sisters, reflected upon the state of our country following the election. I share with you her  Thanksgiving Prayer, remembering the U.S. prior to this election  She writes:

Creator God, we thank you and praise you

for the opportunity to have lived in a country open to the community of nations and their gifts to us rather than espousing a national political goal of living in isolation from them.

We thank you and praise you

for the memory of a United States where difference, it seemed, was finally seen as the lifeblood of our future, rather than a threat to the present;

We thank you and praise you

for a government that strove to embrace the new while keeping the best of the old rather than seek to revive a past long gone;

We thank you and praise you

for a country in which the role of religion was to grow our spirits rather than feed our fears or capture and control our politics.

We thank you and praise you

for a people of many colors and cultures and gifts who enriched one another's understanding of life rather than set out to set one against the other.

We thank you and praise you

for a country that sought to treat both women and men as equals rather than continue to shape a society in which men were to be privileged and women were meant to be preyed upon;

We thank you and praise you

for a country that attempted to help those who could not help themselves rather than abandon the needy for the sake of increasing the profits of the wealthy;

We thank you and praise you

for a nation that sought by reaching out to others, by defending the oppressed and supporting the defenseless to become a real moral leader of the free world rather than exploit the weak and reject the desolate for the sake of national aggrandizement.

Finally, we thank you and praise you

for those who have led us with noble vision and compassionate hearts. We give thanks for their great respect for democracy and deep commitment to the common good rather than to partisan politics. It is to them we owe the ongoing unity of differences in this land. It is in their names and through their spirit that we seek unity again in our now divided country.

From where I (Sister Joan Chittister) stand, it is on those things that the future of this already great nation depends.

She writes: Happy Thanksgiving. May the memory of the past great vision of this country give us all the energy and strength it will take to revive that vision again. It is those ideals and that kind of community covenant that dries my own tears.

[Joan Chittister is a Benedictine sister of Erie, Pa.]

Grief-stricken in Spirit

In today’s first reading, Tobit 3: 1-11a, 16-17, Tobit, “grief-stricken in spirit,…groaned and wept aloud,” acknowledging the sins of his nation:

We have sinned against you,

and disobeyed your commandments.
 So you handed us over to plundering, exile, and death,
till you made us the talk and reproach of all the nations
among whom you had dispersed us.”

He could be, and is, also speaking about the world of today and, in particular, the United States of America, which recently dedicated its “First Atheist Monument” (Newsmax).   This led me to the following dialogue with Jesus: 

“As a nation, Lord, we have sinned against You and disobeyed your commandments, worshipping the false gods of money, consumerism, materialism, hedonism; adoring power, pleasure, possessions and the “freedom” to do whatever the ego desires in asserting its power.  We’ve scorned justice, honesty and integrity. We’ve stomped on wisdom, prudence, humility and respect of humanity, male and female, and all of creation. Greed guides our steps, not wisdom.  So you handed us over to the consequences of our sinful behaviors, our idolatry, our abuse of each other and of the earth, our unbridled passions.  Our wars as well the earthquakes, tsunamis, tornados, hurricanes, floods, fires are a symbol of human nature’s unbridled use of “freedom,” its abuse of power, pleasure and possessions, upon which our loyalties and idolatrous pursuits are passionately linked.  Consequently, chaos exists in all segments of our society.

“Thank You, Lord, that darkness is not dark to You.  Wherever we hide, whether behind atheistic idols or other God substitutes, you are there.  Whichever addiction or idol we allow to take control of our lives, You are more powerful than that addictive or idolatrous behaviors. Whichever god we worship, You are still the only true God, who created the universe and all that is in it.  You alone sustain us in existence.  You alone secured our salvation by Jesus’ life, death, and resurrection, destroying Satan’s power to destroy the Sacred, the Truth and the Way to You.  The gates of heal shall not prevail against the Church.  Satan has no power over believers, over us whom the Father entrusted to You.”

“Dorothy Ann, keep your eyes on me.  Come to me and I will refresh you.  Fear not those who erect false gods. Pity them; do not condemn them. They know not what they are doing. And remember that I am with you always until the end of time.” 

Mary Standing by and with her Son

Holy  Saturday: A day of mourning as Mary and the disciples grieve the crucifixion and death of Jesus.  Many must have known that the leaders of her nation were plotting to kill her son. No doubt, also, Jesus did not keep secrets from His mother.  He knew that His hour was approaching. I sense Mary did, too. Jesus’ prayer at the Last Supper,  “Father,  the hour has come: glorify your Son so that your Son may glorify you; so that, just as you have given him power over all humanity, he may give eternal life to all those you have entrusted to him” does not mean that the physical and emotional pain of His crucifixion and death were negated.  Both Jesus and Mary suffered the full blunt and excruciating agony of the way in which He was treated by the leaders of their nation.  Mary, most likely, witnessed all of it, I believe. She would not have abandoned her Son in the hour of His greatest need.  No healthy mother would do that to her child.

As I reflected on the high probability that Mary witnessed, not only Jesus’ dying on the cross, but also his being nailed to it, I thought of the millions of men and women, children and adolescents, young adults, “nailed” to agonizing, humiliating, violent abusive situations:

·         Those unjustly imprisoned

·         Those sold to the sex trade, to forced labor camps/factories

·         Those “locked” in abusive marriages or other relationships

·         Those enslaved to any and all kinds of addictive behaviors

·         Those battling terminal illnesses and chronic mental disorders

·         Those living in extreme poverty and forced to live on our streets

·         Those forced into gang activity

·         Those unprotected from being murdered in the womb

·         Those unable to escape verbal, emotional, mental, physical and sexual abuse in or outside of their families

O Jesus, you are nailed to the cross and crucified every day by humanity’s inhumane ways of treating each other.

 O Mary, is there any sorrow as great as your sorrow as you watch your sons and daughters, especially little children, being “nailed”  and abandoned to agonizing situations, as Jesus was nailed to the cross and crucified on Calvary?